Friday, May 1, 2009

Jacob and Thoughts on My Life.



























It is hard to watch carefully as Jacob does his "new" things. He is quietly going about his day, doing all the latest baby extraordinary things, and we are so busy living sometimes that I forget to notice. It is particularly difficult because Joshua is also doing new things all the time that we want to notice. I can't seem to make note of each one's particularly fabulous moments every day. But, I have to try.

He is a wonderful walker, and lately has begun trying to figure out how to jump. He will stand there concentrating and give a little bounce. He loves the trampoline and thinks he is jumping even though his feet don't leave the ground. He has also begun trying to jump from his little chair onto the ground. Not easy to do if you still don't bend your knees when you jump!!

One thing about Jacob that strikes me is his cautious nature. Anybody who knows Jacob knows him to be a big, burly little guy, but to also be extremely careful. When my girlfriends and I gather with our children at Karissa's house, we never worry about Jacob and the stairs. We never really have. We watched him once or twice attempt to go up or down and knew we didn't have to worry. He attempts the same stair 6 or 7 times until he KNOWS he can conquer it, then attempts. If there is a curb he wants to go down, he literally turns around, gets on all fours, and scoots backwards over the curb. Beginning about 3 feet from the actual drop off. And until this past week, he was terrified of swings. Hated them, wouldn't go in them by choice, and if you did force him in, he would claw at you and pitifully moan until you picked him up. He is finally adjusting to swinging through lots of prodding, but it has been a challenge. He is just not much of a risk taker.

He has begun trying to talk, and his vocabulary is pretty good even if not always very clear. He loves to try to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle" and "ABC's" and joins in whenever he can on whatever else we sing. He repeats words all the time, and is really trying to figure out this verbal world. He blows kisses and points to his nose, and loves to clap and dance to any sort of beat.

Jacob is also one of the happiest kiddos around. He is quick to laugh and smile, and loves to play silly games. If he is upset, silly noises are enough to bring him out of it and make him happy again. He makes a wonderful trilling noise with his tongue - it is amazing, and surprisingly loud, particularly during church. He loves his pacifier, but more often than not is just holding it sideways in his mouth, not using it to suck. Just more of a comfort, I think. He goes to sleep easily, but still wakes at night. He loves any toy or object that makes noise, pops up, stacks or goes into another. He loves his plastic piggy bank and coins and puts the coins in the slot over and over. He also loves to play with Joshua's cars, my cooking utensils (which I frequently find strewn about the kitchen floor) and throwing things away. Anytime I can't find a shoe, or socks, or hey, the can opener, I can look in the trash can. That of course ensures frequent trips to take out the garbage.

He has such wonderful moments. He is cuddly and will snuggle right into you. He loves to be held and will sit contentedly on your lap as long as you can handle it. He also pitches the greatest fits. I know it sounds crazy to include that in his wonderful moments, but if you look at the video you will see why it is such a moment.

Jacob is more than we ever dreamed. I remember how cautious we were about having a second baby, worried about it detracting from Joshua, worrying and wondering if we could ever love another baby like we do the first. And I know all parents think the same. But we needn't have worried. I don't think we do love our babies the same. It is different because you have a different relationship with each one. I love both my boys so much it is about more than I can comprehend. And I don't love one MORE than the other. It is just different. And Joshua hasn't lost out on anything through having a baby brother. I believe his life is more complete and fun and happy and joy-filled because Jacob is a part of it. Watching Joshua be a big brother is a wonderful moment I get to have each day. If he has a graham cracker, he wants Jacob to have one. If Joshua gets two jelly beans for going peepee in the potty, he thinks Jacob should get some, too. What more could I ask?

Being the mom of these two little guys and the wife of my husband is such a privilege. I know how lucky, how blessed I am and I am trying very hard to pay attention and not take it for granted.